The following is a shortened version of yesterday’s post.
How can you feel good about life, no matter what else is happening around you?
Three beliefs make a very practical difference in life, providing a sense of okay-ness and equanimity. They are the three beliefs logotherapy is based on.
Believing meaning is always there to be found, you never tire of looking for it, and it instill the sense that there is a purpose to the events in your life even when you can’t figure out what that purpose is.
Believing you are always free to pursue meaningful goals you never feel helpless. You can be your own boss who is resourceful, is focused on what you can do and who thinks about and then humbly, courageously and confidently implements what seems to be the best course of action.
Believing in your own inner longings you get in touch with your passion and live for the sake of something beyond you that you care about. You have a single-minded focus and are willing to endure frustration and obstacles on the way so you can follow your heart.
However, it’s not as simple as that. We are often challenged by an onslaught of situations that seem to our way of looking at things to be meaningless, and this flies in the face of our conception of how things are “supposed to be.”
What is it that empowers people to continue search when the answers seem elusive? What empowers people to not doubt the validity of their longings when everyone is telling them they’re wrong or it’s hopeless? What empowers people to find strengths when their resources are so very limited?
Logotherapy doesn’t set out to manage “coping” with what is meaningless. Instead logotherapy assists in finding out how whatever seems meaningless right now can actually become meaningful.
Essentially the choice is between two options: Are you focused on your ego or on your values? The meaningless can become meaningful when you focus on values and away from self-preoccupation. The latter is marked by preoccupation with what others think of me. It manifest in statements like “I’m not good enough. I can’t. I’m too tired. This is not how I want things to be.”
A value-focus is not a means of escape or distraction. Firstly it is assumed that people want their lives to have meaning, so that’s what they’re looking for. They are longing to fulfill values, i.e. do valuable things in the world. Secondly since they cannot change what is not in their control what they need when they are unhappy with their situation is not to “think positive” or to feel cheated by life, but to discover the potential value the situation is actually offering them. What is life so to speak “waiting” for you to do? Yes, there is a vacuum here, and you are meant to fill it! So a value-focus adopts the attitude of “I don’t care how difficult it is, this is too important to me to give up on it.”
Difficult situations are no more nor less than puzzles that challenge and invite us to use our unique strengths and actualize our unique longings. The biggest challenge of all is to act on and embody our beliefs, rather than let them collect dust on the shelf while our actions belie our belief in these things.
We can succeed in transforming our beliefs into action when we are plugged into our values (our power-source), because values are beliefs-in-action. You plug into your values by doing the kinds of things all exemplary people do. You trust yourself and trust in life, and don’t try to fight what is. You practice paying attention to value-potentialities. You describe the facts dispassionately, leaving your distorted interpretations out of it. That way you’ll see all of what’s in front of you – the good with the bad, the now with the future possibility. You see yourself from the perspective of someone who has an important role to play in the cosmos, with tasks to perform that no one can do in your place. Finally, you are committed to that which you care deeply about, so that the focus is not on you but on what you’re here for.
“The Empty Cup” course is designed with this process in mind, starting with trust in one’s self and trust in life, then awareness of our values (passion/longings) and paying attention to the possibilities for their fulfillment in our situation, accessing our inner wisdom and commitment to the whole process.