Love endures when the person is no longer alive, and even when the person is alive and love is expressed through the bodily manifestation of spirit, love nonetheless exists independently of the person’s physical presence.
One line in The Doctor and the Soul that is particularly powerful for me is: “While the ‘shallow’ person sees only the partner’s surface and cannot grasp the depths, the ‘deeper’ person sees the surface itself as an expression of the depths, not as an essential and decisive expression, but as a significant one.” (p. 140)
The pleasure I get from my children especially is so sweet. I see the manifestation of their spirit in the way they gently and patiently educate their children, in the way they show gratitude, in their consideration for the feelings of others and in their creativity. Even in their struggles, I can see the spirit that is struggling to be free.
I’m not sure what Frankl means by the last phrase in this sentence that I’ve quoted – “not as an essential and decisive expression, but as a significant one” but I think this is what he means: Whatever a person does and says is an expression of the spiritual essence which lies beneath the physical surface, and there is significance to these words or this action as a manifestation of that spirit. But any physical expression is always only a means to manifesting a spiritual existence which is itself essentially inexpressible.
When people want to demonstrate their love for one another, they do any number of tangible things that demonstrate their love. Love is in the details of how you show it.
Here too, love is in the details in a different sense. Frankl is not talking about demonstrating love, nor is he talking about being the recipient of a demonstration of love.
He’s talking about the love and connection that come as a result of experiencing the person’s spiritual essence.
Who is this person I’m encountering? Being made of flesh and blood, we experience who this person is through the details of what they do. Yet, what they do pales in comparison to who they essentially are.