We just got a new game called Fastrack. Each player pushes on a little disk against a band, to get it through a hole to the opponent’s side. One of my kids commented that I would not have been so good at this game in years past, but that I am much calmer now than I used to be.
As usual, he is very perceptive, and correct in his assessment.
It also made me realize the connection between calmness and the logotherapeutic techniques and principles that I’ve been writing about lately.
How does calmness help you win a fast-paced game?
The opposite of calmness is anxiety, which comes either from trying to force the result, i.e. trying to control what is not in your control, from obsessively watching your own performance or from doing both these things at the same time.
If I would have been fixated on my need to win, I would have been busy worrying about whether or not I would succeed in getting the puck through the hole. I would be busy obsessing over every time my opponent got the puck through to my side. If I would have been fixated on watching my performance, I would be obsessing over not being good enough.
Instead, I was able to calmly and persistently focus on the task at hand, without any distractions. I was able to win, because I wan’t thinking about winning but about how I need to aim.
This rule can be applied to all of life.
There will be a break from this blog for a week. I’ll be back on April 2.