It is widely known that massage energizes and also relaxes the body. It is a useful way to loosen tight muscles and bring healing in a wide variety of conditions. A perhaps lesser known benefit is the intimacy it brings to partners.
Matt Gleicher, an accomplished Massage Therapist, certified Craniosacral Therapist and Myofascial Release practitioner teaches couples something he calls ‘intentioned touch.‘
I want to write from the standpoint of a workshop participant.
Anything we do with intention we do with full presence. When partners give each other the gift of intentioned touch they are fully present for each other.
Through the flow of energy coming out through the hands of one and into the body of the other spirit touches spirit. As giver and as receiver I experienced touch as a flow of energy and aliveness, of love and a desire to give. The effects even of this one session, and even in the way it was done where the couples were fully clothed, had a ripple effect that impacted us both in a positive way later on in the day.
The intimacy made possible through touch and massage goes deeper than speech. The body knows what it’s feeling and what emotions are aroused and we can trust it. This trust brings communication to a higher level in all aspects of life.
If negative energy is blocking the flow this is also something to be aware of. We can block the negative energy so that the positive energy becomes pure again.
As Matt writes (in the link cited above): “There is a deep, intuitive knowledge that they are listening to you with every fiber of their being with no prejudgment, prejudice or need to change you. They know how to just be there with you and allow you to be the real you. That, I believe, is an invaluable tool for spouses to have. It’s the ultimate art of listening.”
Matt doesn’t teach what you could learn in a book. He sees how you’re doing it and gives gentle guidance. At one point when my partner touched a certain sensitive spot on my back I jumped. “If the person jumps at a sensitive spot, stop and go into it again building more slowly,” he explained. My partner followed Matt’s instructions and it was amazing how relaxing it was the second time around. Co-facilitating the workshop is Chedva director Shimshon Meir Frankel, who brings participants into the mood with a guided visualization of happiness.
Intentioned touch should be included in every program for marriage preparation. Its incorporation into a relationship right from the beginning sets up conditions for presence, listening and open lines of communication. Far more than just being a way to repair what is blocked, it will make any good relationship stronger. Why be satisfied with less when life offers so much more?