What happens when you take care of something in a less than ideal way, because for whatever reason you’re not capable of doing it the ideal way? Does it irk you thinking about how you would have liked to have handled it but were not able to?
Recently, I asked a client to think about how she can still feel good about herself despite her wishing she could have communicated in the way she would have liked.
She felt that she handled it maturely, in a way that was protecting herself. Had she handled the situation in the “ideal” way, she would have put herself into a vulnerable position and would have come out of the experience saying and doing things she would regret. This way she avoided getting pulled into the other person’s negative energy. She stayed in her safety zone.
She felt okay with this, knowing that what she did do, was the step she needed to take now. She is moving forward without stretching herself beyond the line that she can stretch.
I agreed, and said that she can love herself for where she is now, simply because this is who she is right now. If she would act as if she’s someone other than who she is, and not recognize her boundaries at this juncture in her life, it would not be real.